A new-born child do not know what Fear is until it is properly introduced by the parents. Once acquainted, Fear had a death grip on you, letting go occasionally but never completely. It lurked at the back of your mind, always ready to pounce into your imagination.
And so it was, that Fear gripped me once again last night when my pooch barked suddenly at the empty space before her. It was an extraordinary bark, a soft growling bark, if you will. Urban legend had it that the spirit of the dead wandered our world for 100 days before it leaves and that during this time, it goes where it will. It was never proven to be true but it was enough to give me the jitters. I was not afraid of the old man and we did have a good relationship but the spooky shift in the status quo changed everything. The fact that I was all alone at home when the barking began did not help. This was further compounded by the growing darkness outside as the evening progressed into twilight.
The first Death I remembered was when my grandmother passed away. She was seated in the lotus position right next to me, on my left. Her head hung low and her eyes were wide open. She was lifted and propped upon a chair whereupon strange rituals began. I knew something dreadful had happened to her although I did not know what it was. It was the looks on the adult's faces which set the first alarm. Something scary was about to happen.
See? My sister once took me (when I was this high) to the movies to watch a flick where a dead man stood up from his coffin. He swirled like a dervish and with each swirl, he transformed into something ghastlier eventually turning into a grotesquely sallow zombie . I was too young at the time to watch horror movies. It left a lasting impression on me. I half expected my grandma to stand up on her feet and scare the daylights out of everyone. Obviously that did not happen. Fear is irrational.
Take thunderstorms for instance. Some mothers gripped their children tight and clamp their ears shut during a thunderstorm, thereby giving the impression that thunderstorms are to be feared. The same pattern can be seen in canines. My first Chihuahua (Poppy) feared fireworks and thunders. Venus - picture here was 8 months old when the chihuahua joined our household. An impressionable dog, Venus emulated the chihuahua's habits. She was prancing playfully in the rain one day before she stopped in mid action to watch the trembling chihuahua during a light thunderstorm. Soon she picked up the impression that thunderstorms are to be feared, a position she maintained to this day. Her "protege" (Xena - picture here ) picked this up recently so I now have two trembling dogs trying to outdo each other every time it pours. Ginger (my indoor chihuahua) is now 7 years old. She was separated from the outdoor dogs so she never picked up their fear.
My point? If you wish to bring up a thinking child, don't scare your kids until they're ready to be scared.
The first Death I remembered was when my grandmother passed away. She was seated in the lotus position right next to me, on my left. Her head hung low and her eyes were wide open. She was lifted and propped upon a chair whereupon strange rituals began. I knew something dreadful had happened to her although I did not know what it was. It was the looks on the adult's faces which set the first alarm. Something scary was about to happen.
See? My sister once took me (when I was this high) to the movies to watch a flick where a dead man stood up from his coffin. He swirled like a dervish and with each swirl, he transformed into something ghastlier eventually turning into a grotesquely sallow zombie . I was too young at the time to watch horror movies. It left a lasting impression on me. I half expected my grandma to stand up on her feet and scare the daylights out of everyone. Obviously that did not happen. Fear is irrational.
Take thunderstorms for instance. Some mothers gripped their children tight and clamp their ears shut during a thunderstorm, thereby giving the impression that thunderstorms are to be feared. The same pattern can be seen in canines. My first Chihuahua (Poppy) feared fireworks and thunders. Venus - picture here was 8 months old when the chihuahua joined our household. An impressionable dog, Venus emulated the chihuahua's habits. She was prancing playfully in the rain one day before she stopped in mid action to watch the trembling chihuahua during a light thunderstorm. Soon she picked up the impression that thunderstorms are to be feared, a position she maintained to this day. Her "protege" (Xena - picture here ) picked this up recently so I now have two trembling dogs trying to outdo each other every time it pours. Ginger (my indoor chihuahua) is now 7 years old. She was separated from the outdoor dogs so she never picked up their fear.
My point? If you wish to bring up a thinking child, don't scare your kids until they're ready to be scared.
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